The ridiculous life of MamaMareenz

i'm going to tell you what i weigh, but don't tell anybody...

nyclivin — Wed, 08 May 2013 22:53:46 -0400

WEIGHT: 127 lbs.

BMI: 23.0

i have recently acquired quite the ass. now don’t get me wrong, i love my big ol’ booty; after all fat bottomed girls make the rockin world go ‘round-but my butt (see what i did there, hehe) has attracted a lot of attention. my family likes to state it every time i come around,”WOW your ass has gotten HUGE”-oh thank you for telling me- i took a little vacation from my body and i hadn’t noticed (imagine the side eye emoji here). of course, along with the new junk in the trunk, ive got a little extra lovin in the handles, and a teensy bit of side boob *sigh*. since this weight gain is harder to hide than it’s ever been, people seem to think it’s appropriate to mention it. some people even find it acceptable to give me dietary guidelines, “do you really think you need that cookie?”, “that’s a LOT of carbs on your plate.” I’M GETTIN HELLA CLOSE TO PUNCHING SOMEONE IN THE FACE. the strangest part is i am in no way over weight, i’m just slightly heavier than i have been before. my BMI is at a healthy number, i go to yoga 5-6 times a week, and i ran a 5K and didn’t die- i’m in decent shape.

now the point of this post isn’t to rant about my weight gain, it’s about reminding us ladies that weight is a unit of mass- but from a very young age, ladies are taught that weight somehow affects our worth as a woman. there is a 3 pound range of perfection, if you’re over that you’re fat. if you’re under you’re sooo anorexic and/or a coke whore. it’s about other women (and men) thinking it’s okay to comment on your weight as if what they think matters. it’s about the pins on pins on pins of girls posting “skinny recipes”, “BIKINI WORK OUT”, “lose 15 lb with our juice cleanse”. it’s about the Abercrombie and Fitch CEO being comfortable saying his clothes are only for “thin and beautiful people”. Seriously?

i never thought i suffered from this weird weight delusion most girls suffer from, but i do. i have found myself recently taking those “big ass” comments to heart. i wear baggy sweat pants whenever possible, i’ve even wore 2 pairs of spanx on a date (super uncomfortable, i don’t recommend it. very hard to pee.). looking back, i have never, ever been “happy” with my weight. i have covered muffin tops that weren’t there, I have jiggled arm fat in disgust that was not actually arm fat, but skin. i am so used to being self conscious of my weight that i never even noticed it. it doesn’t matter what weight we’re at, we’re constantly trying to look thinner. ladies WHAT GIVES?! can we all decide to stop letting a stupid number run our lives and be happy with our awesomely unique, curvy bodies? these bellies and hips will carry children- these bodies are marvelous, incredible machines, WHY THE HELL ARE WE GLORIFYING SKIN AND BONES, and why are we constantly critiquing one another?! clavicles and hip bones are not sexy, CONFIDENCE is sexy. HEALTHY is sexy. YOU ARE SEXY!

So let me be the first to declare it: i am not ashamed of my weight. i will no longer mumble it in the doctor’s office, i will not be embarrassed if my jeans are a little snug, I WILL EAT THAT DAMN CUPCAKE IN FRONT OF MY DATE IF I WANT IT! i will gladly, and shamelessly post my current weight on the internet for all the world to see. JUDGE ME.

and the next time someone mentions my big ass i will respond with what i’m really thinking, “i know, it’s freaking awesome isn’t it?”

maybe it’s the warm weather, maybe it’s my lonely,...

nyclivin — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 14:25:00 -0400

maybe it’s the warm weather, maybe it’s my lonely, eager-to-concieve uterus, maybe i’m just becoming a softy, but i’m feeling uber romantic lately. so instead of googling ~~“mail order husband”~~ (**note: i did actually googled this out of curiosity- you can actually mail order a husband- I SHIT YOU NOT, but the results are very disturbing. i’m scarred. i don’t even wanna joke about mail ordering a husband now….so just forget it, bad joke.).

anyways, i decided to kill off this romantic feelings by making a list of super duper love songs. If these don’t make you want to slow dance in a puffy pink organza dress bathed in moonlight with the one you love then nothing will. I’ve included all the videos so you can spend your day feelings all sappy just.like.me. YOU’RE WELCOME.

I love, you love- John Legend

It’s John Legend, everything that comes out of his mouth is romantic. Even when he tries to sing about dirty things, they still sound sweet and cuddly. I might listen to this song on repeat for hours at a time….and by might i mean i do.

Give me your emotion, your heart’s devotion.
Give anything you like.
And I’ll give understanding. Life’s so demanding.
I’m all you need to get by.

**SIGH**

Nothing Even Matters- Lauryn Hill feat. D’Angelo

The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill is just seeping with love and romance, there’s a song version of 1 corinthians. But this song in particular, i really love. It perfectly sums up that infatuation phase of love, where you’re legit high off someone. It’s not even real life, you’re just floating around in mushy, gushy love. The sun is brighter, the sky is bluer, all because your special someone is sharing the same earth as you. EVERYONE loves that feeling and this song brings you back to that place.

Sunday Morning- Maroon 5

Perfect song. LOVE LOVE LOVE this song. Nothing else to say.

You’re my best friend- Queen

OOOOOHHH you’re making me liveeeeeee. There’s this point in a relationship when you realize that you’re significant other is your best friend. That’s when relationships get to be really fun. Nothing is too stupid, or embarrassing, or ridiculous to share with each other. In fact, you have this crazy urge to share EVERYTHING with each other. Because that’s what best friends do.

Open- Rhye

This is another one of those songs when I heard it, I kept listening to it over and over again. I’m obsessed, it’s perfect.

I’m a fool for the shake in your thighs, I’m a fool for that sound in your sighs, I’m a fool for your belly, I’m a fool for your love.

Also, the video is the classiest semi-porno ever- how did they make a soft core porno tasteful and romantic? i don’t know- but I LOVE IT. I’m not going to post this video because my mom reads this blog (she might be the only one who reads this blog, HI MOM!) and then she’ll yell at me for posting the video. BUT if you were to watch the video you could just google “open rhye EP video”. DISCLAIMER: lots of hipster sex.

First Day of My Life- Bright Eyes

Cutesy, cutesy love song. Did this song really come out 8 years ago? Holy poop, I’m getting old.

Flaws and All- Beyonce

QUEEN B gets insecure sometimes and Jay loves her anyways. awwwwwww. that is all.

Want to hear the whole list? Check out my spotify playlist posted above!!!!

"The universe seems neither benign nor hostile, merely indifferent." --Carl Sagan

nyclivin — Thu, 28 Mar 2013 14:53:58 -0400

I have said “it’s not fair” a million times in the last few weeks. It seems to be my response for everything lately. It’s not fair people we love die- that good, promising lives are cut short for no reason at all. It’s not fair some people are starving to death, while others have such excess. It’s not fair that I’m healthy, and there are perfect, beautiful babies that are not. It’s not fair that we discriminate and judge one another because of who we are. I want to stomp my feet like a toddler and and throw a tantrum, pound my fists against the floor and cry until the universe caves in and says, “You’re right, it’s not fair! No one will suffer anymore and everything will be perfect!”. But, that’s the thing, the universe doesn’t care. It is not spiteful, or out for revenge- it’s just truly indifferent. It keeps moving, come hell or high water. The sun rises and sets, the waves hit the shore, babies are born, your heart keeps beating until it stops. We have no more control of the universe than the trees or stars do. We are simply on a ride. A crazy, beautiful, tragic, surprising, unexplainable ride.

So, instead of stomping my feet and protesting the unfairness of life, I will enjoy this ride. I will embrace every feeling I experience. The fear, the joy, the anger, the sadness and the love. I will change what I can and accept what I cannot. I will be thankful for all of the people who have crossed my path, whether we share a lifelong journey, or a few fleeting moments. I will find the things that bring me joy, and fill my life with them. I will stop putting blame and anger back into the world when something terrible happens, instead I will fight the darkness with light and love. I will also stand on the side of love whenever I can.

I am going to take it all for what it’s worth, and enjoy it all as much as I can.

everything i need to know, i'm learning from YOGA: weeks 1-4

nyclivin — Tue, 05 Feb 2013 23:38:00 -0500

This week marks my forth week of regular yoga classes. I seriously cannot believe I’ve stuck to something consistently for an entire month, that is VERY un-Marina like. But that’s the thing about yoga: it’s addicting. Getting to my mat is by far my favorite part of day. I usually go to class around 7- and by 3 I’m ITCHING to get to the studio.

I am in the VERY early stages of my study, but I cannot believe how much it has already changed my perspective on life. It was like a switch has been flipped. So I decided I’ll share my journey, and encourage others to join me :)

Here is what I have learned so far:

If it doesn’t make you uncomfortable, you’re not getting anything out of it.

Let’s talk about Utkatasana (Chair pose). This is my “oh no, please not this” pose. You see before I started going to hot yoga, I had never actually felt my muscles “burn”. As soon as my body started to feel uncomfortable doing something, I would stop whatever I was doing. So, when my teacher had us in utkatasana on my first day of class, I wanted out as soon as my legs started to ache. That is when he said, “When you start to feel uncomfortable, and you still decide to go deeper into the pose - that is yoga”. I held it, and held it, and held it. MY GOD IT ACTUALLY FELT LIKE MY THIGHS WERE ON FIRE!!!!! But I held it, and when the moment passed I had never felt more proud of myself in my entire life. I literally had the BIGGEST grin my mouth could possibly form. These moments still creep up every day on my mat, I could half ass the pose and get by, or I can face the discomfort, embrace the pain- and let it pass, and when it does have the most satisfying feeling of accomplishment imaginable.

Acknowledge the feeling, then let it pass.

Being raised in an Italian/Catholic family I know two feelings: guilt & shame. When I mess up, I feel guilty. I react towards my negative actions or thoughts, with more negative actions and thoughts. I’ll let a 2 minute blip of embarrassment, or anger be the focus of my entire day. It’s a cycle of negativity!! Yoga has taught me that it is okay to acknowledge whatever feeling you are having. Whether it is fear, failure, pride, or anger. But once you have acknowledged that feeling- let. it. go. Do not sit there and get MAD at yourself for getting MAD. Just let the feeling come up, and pass. Turn the light inside yourself back on and let it drown the darkness.

Your ego is trouble, trouble, trouble!!!

99.9999999999% of the time I don’t do something because I am afraid to fail. The “What ifs” run my life. What if I look stupid? What if I embarrass myself? What if I fall? One of the most challenging parts of yoga is not letting your ego interrupt your practice. Something as simple as taking an easier modification of a pose if you are not ready to do the full pose is a challenge because of our egos. “I don’t want to look stupid, everyone else is doing the full pose.” That moment you look at yourself in the mirror and think “my arms are SOO big and flabby”-that’s your ego. There is no shame in wherever you are in life, or in your practice. Once you can let go of your ego, you will find true peace…..too bad that’s the hardest part of life.

I am so much greater than I ever imagined.

I spent 23 years of my life talking myself down. I wasn’t smart enough, pretty enough, good enough, confident enough, talented enough, brave enough. I had talked myself into believing these things when NONE of them were true. I am truly my own worst enemy. As I sit on my mat, usually at the end of the day, in a hot, humid room I acknowledge the fact that I made it there to practice! I am enough just because I came when I had a million excuses not to. I am enough when I want to stop SO bad, but I keep pushing. I am enough when I have to stop, because I am tired, or thirsty. I have found even when I fail- I feel a million times better than when I never tried. Who knew that pushing yourself 3 more breathes in a pose could allow you to see how GREAT you truly are?

50 things that won't be joining me in 2013.

nyclivin — Fri, 28 Dec 2012 16:31:00 -0500

1. Taking a nap if I got 8 hours of sleep the night before.
2. Putting off the dishes for “tomorrow”.
3. Pressing the snooze button 2,3,4,5,6,7 times.
4. Impulse purchases.
5. Avoiding returning/ making phone calls.
6. Making a to do list and NOT doing anything on it.
7. Treating my car as my personal garbage dump.
8. Not going to the gym because I don’t want to have to wash my hair.
9. Credit card debt.
10. Not filling up my tank with gas until my gas light’s on.
11. Not trying something because I’m too scared I’ll fail.
12. Any sort of excuse making.
13. Not taking care of myself by: putting poison food in my body because it’s easy, being lazy, caving in to peer pressure, not treating my body like the temple that it is.
14. Treating those around me with less respect than I demand for myself.
15. Being late for work.
16. Feeling inadequate.
17. Passing judgement.
18. Eating because I’m bored.
19. Watching TV from the time I get home from work, until the time I go to bed.
20. Being sad for no good reason.
21. Not taking time every, single day to meditate.
22. Counting the dogs getting loose in the hallway when I open the door as their “daily exercise”.
23. Filling my life with material things to bring myself satisfaction and happiness.
24. Being insecure.
25. Overwhelmingly messy, unorganized apartments.
26. Saying “no” to things because I’m too lazy, or tired, or scared.
27. Giving 50% when I should/could be giving 100%.
28. Putting out negative energy.
29. Not wearing my nice clothes because I don’t feel like ironing them.
30. Spending all of my time wanting what others have, instead of spending my time working towards those things.
31. Buying more books on my Kindle when I have 7 in queue.
32. NOT brushing up on my Italian.
33. Not taking the time to look my best every day.
34. Going to bed without washing my face.
35. Taking the easy way out.
36. Being a hypocrite.
37. Setting my standards low because it’s easier.
38. Pushing people away.
39. Finding the negative in every situation instead of the positive.
40. Binge eating.
41. Biting my nails.
42. Putting hand wash only clothes in the washer, and putting my good knives, pots, & pans in the dishwasher.
43. Not being honest with myself/ others.
44. Avoiding/ tuning out constructive criticism/ taking offense to it.
45. Loving lazily.
46. Not living in New York City.
47. Keeping negative people in my life.
48. Being selfish.
49. Being mediocre.
50. Not taking advantage of my blessings, and opportunities in my life.

im feeling nostalgic, 90s babies join me.

nyclivin — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:29:00 -0500

it’s almost christmas, but it’s just not the same as it used to be. in honor of the holidays i felt like reminiscing. so i put together a list of my favorite childhood toys. is it weird that i remember chewing on 90% of the toys on this list? oral fixation much? any whoooo, hope this list makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

ALPHIE

My best friend Jennifer had one of these at her old house. I very clearly remember playing with it before I got yelled at and put in time out for unplugging the Christmas lights.

GOOEY LOUIE

My mom wouldn’t let my brother and i have this because she said it was “disgusting”. WHAT-EVER MOM, TALK TO THE HAND!!! my cousins had it though, so we played with it at their house.

DEAR DIARY

One of the many signs I had ADHD as a child was that I would constantly forget the password and never be bale to open my secret diary. I probably reset the stupid things more than I unlocked it with the pass code…so frustrating for a absent minded little girl.

FISHER PRICE KITCHENS:

It is important to note, I had a little tikes play kitchen (the one with the coffee pot), THIS one was Jennifer’s- this kitchen was also used as Cubbies- the most well thought out, successful, and long lived pretend restaurant ever run by 7-10 year olds. I believe a specialty was spaghetti and strawberry ice cream….

LISA FRANK ERASERS

Again, I really just remember always chewing on these, BUT they were pretty cool. Everyone had to have them and they were considered a TOP NOTCH party favor. If you were lucky, sometimes they would be scented. Also, they were never to be used for erasing.

FISHER PRICE ROLLER SKATES

These were dangerous. The wheels were too little, so every tiny rock was a death trap. I once pushed nicky when he had these one and he fell really hard. im sorry nicky….

BABY ALL GONE

THE CHERRIES SMELLED LIKE CHERRIES! This was an awesome doll. I wonder how the cherries disappeared…just kidding the really loud “click” gave it away… To add on to the things I ingested that I shouldn’t have, I bit a whole through the bottle and drank some of the “disappearing pink milk”. It tasted like poison…because it probably was.

PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS

The official game of choice for any 4-9 girl’s birthday party.

CAT’S CRADLE

We spent hours upon upon hours playing with a piece of string….a $14.99 piece of string.

PUPPY SURPRISE

You opened up the dog’s stomach and out popped a surprise number of puppies. I had three, one of my friends got 5!! I was soooo jealous….

SCENTED STAMP MARKERS

puppy footprints that smelled like chocolate??? I THINK YES!

DOCTOR’S KIT

Please tell me I wasn’t the only one who would put the cast on and try to “trick” people into thinking I really broke my arm?

FASHION PLATES

I seriously thought this was what fashion designers did….until I went to fashion school.

HIT CLIPS

Because everyone wants to hear the same 30 seconds of their favorite song…over…and over…and over….

SKY DANCER

These things were awesome until you did it in the house and it hit the ceiling and the arm broke off and then the fun was over.

COOL MC DONALDS TOYS!

Remember you could dress them in different outfits?

SKIP IT

You would spend days getting the counter up to like a BAJILLION and then your little brother would want to try and erase the counter……and you’d have to start all over again!!!

CHARACTER UNDIES:

Don’t act like you didn’t/don’t still wear them.

TIGER HANDHELD GAMES

The sound effects on these and the picture quality was unreal…

MY SIZE BARBIE

The best way to scare the crap out of a little girl when she wakes up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night at a slumber party…nooo of course that didn’t happen to me….(may or may not have peed my pants).

REPTAR

REPTARRRRRR!!!!!!!

GAK

Gak was banned along with silly putty in my house after i got a whole jar of it stuck on a couch cushion and thought i’d be sneaky and just flip the cushion over. needless to say, i got caught.

STRETCH ARMSTRONG

definitely chewed on this, too.

TAMAGOTCHI

Remember racing home from school to make sure your mom had cleaned up his poop while you were gone?? because if she forgot it would die and he was like 3 days old!!!!

MY FIRST CELLPHONE….

It had snake. Which is still hands down, the BEST phone game EVER.

What toys were your favorite??

when i sleep through the whole day so I haven't eaten in 18 hours...

nyclivin — Mon, 10 Dec 2012 21:00:42 -0500

I just made my own butter, what did you do today?

nyclivin — Wed, 17 Oct 2012 18:57:00 -0400

Im a vegetarian. I don’t eat anything that once took a breath. I don’t eat stock that comes from the bones of things that once breathed. The meat industry is cruel and disgusting.

In fact, the dairy industry is just as cruel- forcing cows to become pregnant again and again, injecting them with hormones (which THEN end up in our bodies) so they produce more milk. i’m beginning to feel increasingly guilty for supporting the dairy industry. but there’s a problem: I am OBSESSED with dairy. After I go running, I need to drink a glass of milk to quench my thirst. I LOVE cheese(as long as there’s no animal rennet in it- but that’s another post), i put it on EVERYTHING. I’m pretty sure the calcium deposits under my eyes are from how much freakin’ dairy I consume. I needed to find a happy medium.

So I did. I researched extensively to find a small, family owned dairy farm that treated their cows with respect and not like milk producing machines. Believe it or not, there aren’t as many of these dairy farms in Upstate NY as you might think. I ended up asking the owners of Albany’s “All Good Bakers” for advice. They are a wonderful, family owned bakery that only serves local food. They also source all of their ingredients (which is AWESOME). They told me all about Meadow Brook farms (I posted their blog entry at the bottom that goes through their summer visit to Meadow Brook, check it out!), and I liked what I saw.

So as my first step to eating dairy with a good conscious was making my own butter (obviously….)

It took 20 minutes, and the hardest part was getting the the freakin top of the food processor to lock!!!

In case you want to make your own, here’s how I did it:

1.) Go buy some LOCAL, fresh heavy cream from the store.

2. Take out an electric mixer, a food processor, or a jar with a lid (yeah im serious) and dump your heavy cream in. (***you will only have 1/2 as much butter as you do cream!)

3. Turn on the mixer, food processor, or if youre using a jar, START SHAKIN BUDDY!!!!

The process is fastest in the food processor, slowest shaking it yourself.

After a moment, you’ll have whipped cream- it’s tempting BUT DON’T STOP NOW!!…okay, okay, have a taste- it’s delicious.

4. Keep that baby blending, and you’ll start to see the consistency change. You’ll hear a difference too- little pieces are butter are starting to form (the fat of the cream is separating from the milk!) Keep mixing until it forms a loose ball. Then drain out the liquid. This my friends is buttermilk. Not the tangy kind you get at the store, but definitely the kind you want to put in your muffins, or- BUTTERMILK PANCAKE BATTER!! Put the buttermilk in the fridge, covered, ASAP. and use within the next day or two.

5. Now that you have a ball of butter it’s tempting to just eat it- and you can. But if you wanna keep it good for more than just the night, it’s important to “wash” the butter to get all the excess milk products off. You can do this by adding a half cup of ICE COLD**super important that it’s ICE COLD** water into the processor and run it. Drain the water. Repeat this until the water runs clear.

It’s also important to use a spatula to work the butter while you do this (while the machine is off) to make sure all of the water is out of the butter).

6. NOW YOU HAVE FREAKIN’ BUTTER!!!!! Keep it in a bowl, or wrap it in wax paper and store in the fridge. It’s good for about a week, or freeze it for up to a month.

It’s delicious, and easy, and there are NO preservatives, or chemicals. Check out the ingredients in Land O’ Lakes butter:

And in your homemade butter: Heavy cream.

UM YUMMMMM.

if you can, stay in college FOREVER.

nyclivin — Wed, 22 Aug 2012 21:36:00 -0400

I GRADUATED IN MAY! (that is a sad exclamation NOT an enthusiastic one) i know, the saddest news you’ve ever heard, right? instead of sleeping in until 1:30 and getting drunk for school functions, and binge eating at 3 am, my life now consists of commutes, laundry and bills. a SHIT TON of bills, and 401ks and taxes…it’s like a nightmare, except it’s real and it’s not going to be over anytime in the foreseeable future.

i’m in a serious bout of depression and the only way i can think to cope is to blog about how amazing my life was up until a few months ago. oh the golden days… here are some suggestions for those of you who are still in college. i didn’t take full of advantage of all these things, so PLEASE PLEASE for the love of God learn from my mistakes…

commitment schamitment. i can’t think of one single thing you should stay committed to in college (except your friends and your netflix account). boyfriends, schools, jobs, majors- don’t tie yourself down. this is your last chance ever to be flaky and make poor decisions with minimal consequences. trust me, once you get out in the real world the free spirit shit doesn’t fly and there’s a freakin contract for everything.
drink as much as you physically can. i think there’s a switch God flips the day after you graduate, or maybe the year long bender that is known as senior year completely killed our livers- but after college you just can’t drink like you used to. you get hangovers, and you’re achey and on top of that you can’t drink during the week because you have to wake up at 6 am to go to work…so you can pay your bills…that leave you with no money left for drinking………JUST KEEP DRINKING NOW!
wear sweats every. single. day. once you go to work you have to wear grown up clothes every day. for the first week or so it’s really exciting. it’s like playing house when you’re little, “oh look im so grown up in my button down!” but after a few days it gets REAL old having to iron every night and tucking in your shirts. you quickly realize grown up clothes are uncomfortable, frumpy, and expensive. do you know what i’d do to walk around in leggings,a hoodie and my ugg moccasins all day?
act immature and do stupid things. everyone expects ridiculous behavior from you- you’re in college and everyone thinks your life is just like animal house- SO DON’T DISAPPOINT! as soon as you graduate people start expecting you to grow up. they want you to be on time for things and not get drunk at corporate functions and shit. it’s a real pain in the ass and just a buzz kill in general. falling out of a moving cab, 3 story funnels, and wearing lime green spandex in public is only acceptable in college, take advantage.
if you’re going to school to get your MRS, give up now. trust me, there are no suitable men in college (possible the world). i think they all migrated, or died out. don’t waste your time trying to find a husband. enjoy the fact that you don’t have a man to deal with, they’re a pain in the ass anyways. use this time to become a boss bitch. as a general rule- do not keep a boy longer than your pedicure lasts. you have your whole life to settle down and be miserable, don’t rush it.
do everything. go on that random road trip with your roommates, take that tequila shot even if it’s one too many, give that kinda cute geeky kid a go, streak at civ scream. even if it sucks- it’ll be a great story one day.

enjoy college, and take LOTS of pictures. it’ll be over faster than you know, and the real world SUCKS.

lolas birthday gift registry.

nyclivin — Wed, 18 Apr 2012 18:06:05 -0400

It’s angel face’s birthday on June 24th, so I thought i’d give everyone a heads up on what she asked for for her BIG FIRST BIRTHDAY!!!!!

Barkin Bandito Plush Toys, $15, trixieandpeanut.com

Just like her mama, Lola loves tequila and cigars.

Pink Feather Canopy Bed, $266, beyondthecrate.com

So the princess can sleep in a princess bed.

Pinot Leasheo Canine Wine, $23, bitchnewyork.com

Every girl needs some wine with dinner, and a nice light and crisp “pinot leasheo” should pair wonderful with lola’s white fish based dog food.

Mule Deer Hard Antler Chew, $17.50 per piece, elkusa.com
The beast chews through everything, we’ve resorted to antlers- she puts a dent in them but has a harder time breaking them down. She’s such a real dog.

Dog Playground, $21,000, dont ask me to source this, i just googled it.

Madison Square Dog Park isn’t cutting it for Lolita baby. I think it’s time she has her own private park to play on.

Wilson 3 dozen Baseballs, $119, amazon.com

She eats through baseballs pretty quickly, so the more we have the better.

nyclivin: suspendedlikespirits: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

nyclivin — Mon, 26 Mar 2012 20:34:47 -0400

nyclivin:

suspendedlikespirits:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

whats on my playlist 3/4

nyclivin — Sun, 04 Mar 2012 19:29:44 -0500

Azealia Banks- when i first saw her pictures i thought aw what a cute girl, what could she possibly rapping about? and then i heard the words coming out of my mouth and i may have blushed. if she can be vulgar enough to make ME blush, she must be pretty vulgar. but anyways, shes ridic. RIDIC. i have nothing more to say, just listen, and then thank me later.

check out 212 and liquorice

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Glass Towers- they are so cute and australian- i just wanna squeeze their faces.

im kind of obsessed with jumanji

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Rizzle Kicks- im into the whole british hip hop thing, i mean how could you not LOVE british hip hop?? its feel good music and i dig it.

check out miss cigarette and mama do the hump.

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Rhye- i dont know who they are, and i dont care. this song is awesome, and the video is the most tasteful explicit youtube video ive seen. listen to it once, and try to not listen to it again… open

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A Fine Frenzy- i have listened to last of days, probably 7500 times in the last week. you may have heard her on the vampire diaries. this song is from 2007, but she has a new album dropping this spring. keep an eye for it.

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The Black Keys- if you havent heard of them yet, hurry up and get on it you’re a year late. just download the entire “brothers” album. i was obsessed with “howlin for you” last year but didn’t get really into them until recently. its just great music.

__________________________________________________________

And a few more to check out:

Zero 7-Paegent of the Bizarre

Buddy Holly- Don’t come back knockin’

Maroon 5- The entire Songs About Jane album

Phoenix- Too Young

welcome to CANDI-LAND!

nyclivin — Mon, 27 Feb 2012 17:27:13 -0500

once upon an epic bender, there was a girl named marina who decided to chase her shots of patron with a pitcher of beer. after 10 hours of drinking, dancing, and getting kicked out of lupias, candi was born. over the past few months, i’ve really gotten to know candi. and let me tell you, I LOVE HER…

now some people don’t like their alter egos (and EVERY ONE has a drunk alter ego, except for marc, that boy is just epic ALL THE TIME), but ive grown fond of candi. sure, at first i was a little taken back by some of her decisions-they were questionable to say the least. but you know what? im glad one of us is having some fun! not only has candi helped me have a great time, but she’s taught me some things i didn’t know about myself. and for that, i’ll be forever grateful. i know that college is almost done, and i wont get to spend nearly as much time with candi as i do now, but instead of being sad im just really going to embrace her for the next few months.

here are just a few reasons i love candi so much,

she doesn’t think about tomorrow, or yesterday. she is completely present in the moment. she takes advantage of the good times that are happening now, and not worrying about tomorrow. she really lives in the present, even if its only because she has to focus all of her attention on not falling over.
she finds the good qualities in everyone…the awkward looking boy is suddenly adorable because “has the cutest laugh”. EVERYONE is good looking in candi’s eyes, which is beautiful and touching and we should all learn from her.
she has the BEST conversations with taxi drivers, um…EVER.
she really knows how to get her moneys worth at an open bar. when a normal person would say “wooooah, i think thats enough for me” candi says “after 10 drinks its like drinking for free, so we need to take advantage of it!!”- champ.
she stays up all night. now everyone knows how i love to sleep, i go to bed at 10:30- not candi, she likes to seize the WHOLE day, she’s a freakin trooper and parties til the sun comes up.
she ~~gets~~ TAKES what she wants. how i wish sober me could just be straight forward and tell everyone exactly what i think/need.
she tells everyone how “fucking beautiful” they are, and caresses their face. aww, what a sweetheart she it.
she falls with complete grace……and then swears at anyone who tries to help her up because shes a “big girl”.

i hope this makes you appreciate your alter ego, and please take the time tonight to have ~~a few~~ 15 drinks and get to know them a little better.

someone at google is judging me.

nyclivin — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 00:25:54 -0500

im going to make a bold move here, but for the sake of writing- i am going to share some of the things i google searched today….oh lord here we go.

snooki skinny pics 2011
quinine glow in the dark
lindsay lohan ribcage tattoo
dean and deluca gift baskets
how long is yogurt good for after the expiration day? (JUDGE ME!!!)
best extensions nyc
kim kardashian reggie bush pics

today was pretty mild actually. probably because i dont have any strange symptoms and also because i checked my laptop search history and not my iphones….that would be a whole other story.

google is amazing. in fact, i cant remember life before any question couldn’t be answered with “just google it”. in fact, i cant remember not knowing something for more than say….30 seconds? HOW DID WE EVER WRITE PAPERS?!?!

but i have one major concern…what if someone is watching my google behavior? i mean i know that google TECHNICALLY monitors our behavior because it uses contextual advertising, but i mean what if a human being was sitting there with a bag of chips just watching us losers google our lives.

“hey fred, remember the girl who googled “how to make grilled cheese?” last week? she just googled “can i get pregnant in a hot tub?” hahahahahaha”

im pretty sure my google search history holds all of my deepest darkest secrets. i mean i share things with google that i wouldnt tell my best friend. because my best friend would judge me, but google wont.

you know those nights when your back hurts and you think you might have a fever so so you decide to google it? and before you know it you are sure you have malaria and then you realize youve been googling for 2 hours and now youre reading an article about the food coloring used in doritos. if someone at google decided to watch my search behavior theyd 1.) think im am absolute NUT JOB 2.) think im a 40 year old mother of 3 3.) realize i have the attention span of a squirrel.

Here are just a few of my favorite GOOGLE PHENOMENONS:

the great comfort you feel when you type your question into the search box and you see that someone has already asked the same question!!! phew, im not a weirdo!!
no matter what your symptoms are,if you google them you will find that its a symptom of pregnancy. “pain in ankle…common symptom of early pregnancy”
googling words just to see if youre spelling them right

on that note, i think im going to go clear my search history.

ready, set, WINTER BREAK!!!!

nyclivin — Sun, 11 Dec 2011 03:49:00 -0500

i dedicate this post to all of my Romans, round 2 is quickly approaching…

we all know i flirted with death over thanksgiving break, so i decided that it would be smart to detox for the two weeks between thanksgiving and winter break, so i could take on the next month full force.

today starts my final week of detox. other than the absurdly expensive mimosa i had with lunch today, and the half a bottle of rum i downed before the VS fashion show viewing party we hosted at school (shhhh thats a secret!), i havent drank anything. ive also (tried) to keep the poor life decisions to a minimum, but that was a major fail….but anywhooo.

i decided to create a list for myself for over winter break. i will be home for a month and a half and i feel as though things are going to get out of hand pretty quickly (judging from the 5 days i was home for thanksgiving….). so here is a list of things i am going to try to keep in mind. while id like to avoid these things, at some point im sure ill get a kick out of trying to check all them off of the list.

THINGS THAT SHOULDNT HAPPEN (AGAIN).

DO NOT end up at Lupias. there is no good time for lupias, ever. unless you are doing some type of anthropological research on creepy social settings or something, then maybe. drinking a pitcher of beer is not an acceptable excuse, neither is “i just wanna dance”. no. no no no.
lets rewind for a second….drinking a pitcher of beer, out of a pitcher? mmmmmm…..na, that just brings swag to a whole other level. that should definitely happen again. maybe this time with one of those curly straws??- oo oo or those straws that you wear like glasses!!
grabbing everyone’s face and telling them “you are SOOOO beautiful. you were always beautiful, but like, now, you are just so so beautiful”. marina, what is wrong with you, people dont like to be groped as theyre drunkenly complimented. seeeesh.
driving 30 minutes on a national holiday to find an open bar. IF ALL OF THE BARS AROUND YOU ARE CLOSED, IT PROBABLY MEANS YOU SHOULDNT BE DRINKING!! ***you shouldnt drink on christmas eve, but i think christmas night is fair game, right?***
do not update your profile picture, tweet, text, reply to wall posts, friend people, or poke someone you knew in 5th grade while intoxicated. will someone just take my phone away please??
your “last” drink should NEVER be tequila…
there is no classy way to drink a 40, so dont even bother.
dont over do Tony’s in the first few days, pace yourself. and dont burn your mouth early in the game, itll be hard to eat another slice for like a week.
dont go to tonys from 12-2, unless you like seeing everyone you are trying to avoid.
find a DD and stick with em. a good DD is better than a good boyfriend. especially one who will take you to taco bell because you NEEEEED A CHEESY GORDITA CRUNCH RIGHT NOWWW!!!!!!

so lets see how this goes, wish me luck its gunna be a wonderful, fun, longggggg break!

UC Davis Incident….absolutely DISGUSTING

nyclivin — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 23:41:54 -0500

UC Davis Incident….absolutely DISGUSTING

my first political piece...DUN DUN DUN!!!!

nyclivin — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 23:41:34 -0500

“I do not agree with what you have to say, but I’ll defend to the death your right to say it.”

-Voltaire

I get riled up pretty easily, but sometimes- i hear about things that happen and i absolutely flip shit. i get that “i cant sit still” anxious feeling in my stomach and feel like i HAVE TO DO SOMETHING to stop it from happening. well my friends, i have that feeling right now. I usually try to keep things upbeat on here, but this disgusted me so much that I have to talk about it.

Lets have a little chat about UC Davis. If you haven’t seen the video yet, watch it above. if you pay attention to just ONE current event this week, let it be this.

12 peaceful protesters were sitting in a walkway, arms linked, and were asked to move because they were blocking a pedestrian path. When they didn’t move when asked, a police officer walks up to them and pepper sprays them in the face. I AM DISGUSTED BY THIS. As much as I hate the whole occupy wall street movement (more about that another day), this kind of reaction from the police is truly disturbing.i am outraged.

You see, men and women have lost their lives protecting our free speech. I am allowed to sit on here and bitch about the government because of the first amendment. WE ARE SO LUCKY to be able to do so, we often forget it because we have NO idea what its like to not be able to voice our opinions!! It makes me absolutely livid that a police officer felt they had the right to TAKE AWAY 12 STUDENTS FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!! how disrespectful to all of the men and women who fought to give us that right. how absolutely un american.

i truly do not believe that all police officers are like this, in fact i believe that most ARE good people trying to protect and serve. what REALLY gets me going about this is that the officers involved were put on “administrated leave”. WHAT?!?!?! they shouldn’t just get fired, THEY SHOULD GET SERIOUS JAIL TIME!!! what they did goes against EVERY THING this country stands for, and they should be absolutely ashamed of themselves. The chancellor of the college should be ABSOLUTELY ASHAMED OF HERSELF. she should take full responsibility for this.

While i completely disagree with the occupy wall street movement, i WILL NOT allow what happened at UC Davis to go unnoticed.

to my unborn daughter(s)

nyclivin — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 00:31:00 -0500

“powder your nose, paint your toes

line your lips; and keep em closed

cross your legs, dot your i’s;

and never let em see you cry”

(****DISCLAIMER: MOM, I AM IN NO WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM ADMITTING YOU WERE EVER RIGHT ABOUT ANYTHING YOU EVER TOLD ME. EVER- YOU WEREN’T. I’LL NEVER GIVE YOU THE SATISFACTION, LOVE YOU <3****)

growing up our mommies tried to warn us about life. they were always eager to give us their advice and opinions on everything, “you have way too much eyeliner on”, “if you ignore him, he’ll like you”,”if you don’t have anything nice to say- don’t say anything at all”,”that skirt is way too short”, “she’s just mean because she’s jealous of you”,”boys dont like girls who dye their hair teal and play rock band all day”(okay, maybe that last one was just me…). it all sounded like constant nagging…it was constant nagging. but maybe, just maybe they could see the big picture when we couldnt.

while im certainly glad i defied EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF ADVICE my mother ever gave me and got to experience all the embarrassing moments, heartache, and hangovers of poor decisions- i already hope that my daughter will learn from me and my mistakes. i know that im destined for bratty, back talking, dramatic girls (my mother has wished it upon me for years, “i pray to God that you have a daughter that’s JUST LIKE YOU!”)- so the odds of them listening to anything i have to say are non existent.

but just in case- i want to write them down so i don’t forget to tell them.

It always feels like the end of the world, but it’s NOT the end of the world. TMI- but this one time in 6th grade I peed my pants in school (judge me, i have a VERY weak bladder…). i was mortified. i thought i would never leave my house again, how could i- i peed in my favorite limited too jeans IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS!!!!! 10 years later, i’m still alive and kicking. and i bet you $50 nobody even remembers that ever happening. in 8th grade, i was dumped by “the love of my life”. i wore black for 2 years and cried myself to sleep every night and listened to good charlotte to ease the pain. i would NEVER LOVE AGAIN!!!! needless to say, he wasn’t the love of my life- and while i look back fondly on my “emo” stage, it passed. and holy crap, i fell in love again….and again…
if you can tell youre wearing makeup , you have too much make up on. i look back at old pictures and im wearing WHITE eyeliner….WHITE- who decided that white was cool?? we all looked like morons. things only got worse when we outgrew the white and moved onto black eyeliner, from 13-15 most of us looked like raccoon prostitutes. and on top of all that, none of us knew how to straighten our hair yet, so we had those awkward bumpy poofs on the top. we were just a mess. to be quite honest, this is something i still struggle with. sometimes my face is a littttttle on the orange side (i still make my mom check it before i go out :-x).
NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER put a man before your friends. just trust me on this one.
on that note, girls are backstabbing, jealous bitches. im a bitch, and i know it. youre a bitch too. it just comes with having a uterus. we all LOVE Mean Girls because we all secretly know we have a lot of regina’s qualities- and as horrible as it is, we’re proud of it. it’s just in our nature. i just hope my daughters realize that girls are going to be mean to one another, and they shouldn’t take it personally. instead, they should tell that little snotty nosed bitch that she is an slut and then steal her boyfriend ….just kidding…..
find a man who thinks the sun shines out of your ass. women are beautiful, amazing beings. we are gentle, kind, loving, and so strong. we have the power to take two teeny, tiny, microscopic cells and turn into a freaking HUMAN BEING in 9 months. find a man who knows this and treats you like the princess that you are. every woman is a treasure- LITERALLY God’s gift to man, YOU DESERVE to be fought for and treated with respect. don’t ever think you have to settle, because you dont. wait for a man who can’t live without you and wants nothing more than to make you happy. youll find one. just be patient. oh, and youll find a lot of douche bags and assholes before that. sorry.

oh, and always listen to me, your mother, because I AM ALWAYS RIGHT!!!

things we should learn our lesson from the first time....but don't.

nyclivin — Tue, 08 Nov 2011 22:02:00 -0500

humans. with our opposable thumbs and smart phones. we think were hot shit, but in all actuality were pretty freakin stupid.

if a dog does something and the consequence is negative over and over again, they stop doing it. the same with mice, and birds, and fish. they learn their lesson. but for humans, it doesnt work that way. we tend to try things over and over and over even after we get the same negative results every single time.

so here is a list of things that we should have learned a lesson from, but still do anyways:

1.) sleeping through registration. first semester of freshman year everyone was up an hour before, double checking their schedules, making back up plans, moving to higher ground for better internet service. but somewhere between then and your first semester of sophomore year pretty little liars marathons and words with friends trumped scheduling your classes.

lets face it, we all know that if you dont wake up at the crack ass of dawn to type in those stupid CRN codes at EXACTLY 6:00:01 am, EVERY SINGLE CLASS YOU ABSOLUTELY NEED will be closed. but does this stop us from taking shots of captain the night before registration? NOPE! because not going out on a monday night would be STUPID.

2.) if you don’t turn the whipped cream can upside down before you spray it, you’ll ruin the whole can. this one’s self explanatory. how many pieces of pumpkin pie have you eaten without whipped cream because you went to spray it in your mouth first and the can wasn’t tilted enough?? there is no greater bummer than feeling a full can of whipped cream and not being able to spray it in your mouth and pretend you are a pimple…

3.)if it acts like an asshole, and talks like an asshole- IT’S PROBABLY AN ASSHOLE!
no, no youre right- by “you’re a stupid bitch” i think he meant “i can’t wait to see you tomorrow”, too.

remember “he’s just not that into you”? YOU ARE NOT THE EXCEPTION (even though at the end of the movie she was “the exception”, which totally ruined the whole concept…but i digress). he/she has not been being a complete and total douche to you to “save up” their niceness to sweep you off your feet and surprise you one day. they are acting like a douche bag because, well…they are a douche bag.

its pretty pathetic how many times we have our hearts ripped out of our chest and ripped up into a thousand pieces to figure this one out. but on the other hand, accepting the obvious and taking people for what they actually are would be so BORING and adele would be out of a job.

4.)you can’t feel your arms, legs, face, or tongue and you mistake the bartender for your uncle john, but you think you should have one more.
that last drink always seems like a good idea, but it never is. it always take you from a good time to, “whoops i just face planted on 7th avenue and threw my iphone under that cab”.

getting shitty is fun, puking your guts out in front of a potential first husband and not remember where you left your shirt is not so fun. so why is it so hard NOT to cross that line? how could we have been drinking since we were in 8th grade and STILL not know when we’ve had enough?? ah, the mysteries of life…

5.)telling just ONE person a secret. we should have learned in elementary school that telling ONE person something, means telling everyone.

when i was in 7th grade i wanted to break up with my boyfriend. i told one of my good guy friends that i was going to do it at lunch, and i told him not to tell anyone. by third period EVERYONE in school knew….how could that have happened?…..”well i told so and so but i told him not to tell…”

“don’t tell anybody, but…” is contagious. it’s a go ahead to tell whoever you want AS LONG as you start it with “DONT TELL ANYONE”. it just passes the blame to the next person. its unbreakable habit, for example i have said the words “dont tell anyone but” 3 times today.oh well, whats the difference- theyre going to find out whatever youre hiding on facebook anyways.

6.) trying to fit in a parking space you know is WAY smaller than your car. you know it, your friend in the passenger seat knows it, but you give it a go anyways. because maybe if you try the space will magically grow. God forbid you had to walk 50 yards into the air conditioned mall.

the funniest part is, when YOURE the one squeezing into the space, its okay and there is DEFINITELY enough room (if you suck in your stomach and turn your head sideways to get out of the car)- but when you walk out of the mall and a crappy old prius is parked ON YOUR ASS, you wonder how the hell anyone in the world could be so stupid and park that close to you.

maybe one of these days well learn our lesson…but i wouldnt hold your breath.

It's Sunday!!!!.....but I read postsecret last night:(

nyclivin — Sun, 04 Sep 2011 14:40:00 -0400

It’s the first weekend of the school year, and I’m already procrastinating. I have a mound of textbooks and syllabuses (that cleared spellcheck, i thought it was syllabi…lame) that need to be read. not happeninggg. I have so much to say and so few friends to say it to, so here i am blogging away. judge me, please.